We were quite a group as we headed for the rock face. Of course, the climbers. And my son, my daughter-in-law, her sister, my granddaughter’s friend, none of whom had climbed before. And then were the Florida visitors, my grandson-in-law’s parents who had arrived the night before from sea-level and for whom taking a walk usually meant meandering down the sidewalk in the evening. (Even in Aspen the elevation is 7908 ft.)
- That my grandchildren use extremely safe practices in their adventures. They don’t free climb and they always check and re-check their equipment.
- That I handled it all with some grace and calm. And that I wasn’t too hard on myself when I had to quit.
- That I wasn’t the only one climbing. Man, that’s a lot of work to set up for one person who only climbs six feet.
3. This is crazy and incidental but I had a class to attend and a dinner to fix whose timing didn’t coincide. Leaving my husband to remember to put a roast in the oven has its drawbacks. Aha! I have all of the modern conveniences…why not use them.
I mastered the “Delayed Start” with the push of a few buttons. Gave it a few thoughts as I sat in my class but then let it go. I arrived home to a roast that was close to ready.
Nice month, huh?
“The Silver Gate requires us to surrender our egos and begin the process of accepting the aging of the body and mind. (…) Our task at this gate is to move beyond the familiar and strengthen our capacity to develop curiosity, trust, and flexibility.” Angeles Arrien
I have been working on this acceptance for years – long before I found this book. In fact, I have written about it many times on another blog. You can read my thoughts here.
For the purposes of this exercise I’m going to wander down the ego path.
If I acknowledge (which I have done) and rest into (in some ways) my aging, what will I gain and what will I lose? This is looking at it from the ego, isn’t it?
I have gained so much and as I move through this book, I realize that there is always more to come. More joy, more wisdom, more sharing, more ease with life, more alignment in spirit and essence.
And there are things that I might not give up so easily.
I hope that I can stay active throughout my life. I have had periods of illness and restricted activity but have always been able to work my way back. I don’t fast-forward toward the “what ifs” and so I don’t know how it will be to give up my strength and vitality.
I am used to how I look. I still feel attractive and winsome. Oh, I gain a few pounds here, a wrinkle there, and sagging lots of things; but, overall my changes come slowly and almost imperceptibly. I continue to try to look my best – and that idea of my best has changed through the years. I think of beauty differently and value a smile emanating from inner good will as an ageless magnet. Will I ever look myself in the eye and be dissatisfied with who I see there? I hope not ever because of superficial changes that we take on with aging. But who knows?
I love my independence. Although I am happy to volunteer and assist those who need assistance, I don’t really contemplate how it will be when I am the one who needs it. I hope I have the wisdom to ask for and accept help. And I hope there is someone like myself who offers their hand in a friendly way as an equal.
I don’t really worry so much about my mind. Of course, I don’t like forgetfulness. But, I have much experience with loved ones with dementia and Alzheimer’s. If the only way I can master “presence” is to be unable to remember the past or plan for the future…so be it!